I just saw an ad that represents everything wrong with this country; and that includes Laura Bush and Pat Robertson.
It implores you to reward your great pet with a great gift. . . FUCK THAT!!!
Let me tell you this right now, if you are my pet you are my PET: Not a full-fucking member of the god-damned family; Not a stand in for my barren loins; Not my child, and not my everything. I have a life and it doesn't revolve around you. I'll feed you and treat you well. You'll be worlds better off than you would be on your own. I'll be a nice guy to you. But, the bottom line is that you are a pet. You don't get a fucking birthday card because you can't read. . . you don't get a fucking Xmas present because you don't have the mental capacity to understand the concept of a holiday!
As a country we spend the hell out of any of our rivals on pet goods. Why is that again? Oh yeah, it is because Fido /needs/ a 3 thousand dollar, insulated, scale replica of Mt Vernon, dog house. We'll spend literally hundreds of millions of dollars a year on useless shit for our animals and just down the street there are homeless people starving. Hey Fido! I just gave $20 dollars to the Denver Rescue Mission so, there will be no supersized beef bones under the Xmas tree for you.
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2 comments:
Dear Matt,
Tell Oscar I still love him and the card is in the mail.
xoxo
Dear Be Kind,
!
-Dirt
Oh shit, your righteous indignation so turns me on. I think I've got a milkbone.
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