Poking a Sleeping Bear, Calgary Edition

I’ve been in Calgary Canada for the last three weeks and there has been no less than four separate bear attacks. One a week seems pretty high to me. All of these attacks have been in people’s front yards mere feet away from their houses. Here are a couple of scenarios to consider:

A bear is hanging out in your front yard do you:

a. do nothing
b. stay inside and call animal control
c. go outside and make a lot of noise to scare the bear away
d. go outside and slowly approach the bear talking to it in low soothing tones explaining how its presence in your yard is unacceptable and that it should go find its own kind and return to nature as the bear thrashes you around like a rag doll.

Apparently these dumbasses think the best solution is either C. or D.

It is a bear for F^@& sake!